The Hero Of The Zeros

Let me tell you that I didn’t intend on writing about Wayne because he is becoming old news to me since I haven’t heard any new music from him. Then up pops this latest ‘freestyle’ remix and the internets goes crazy as if some really good music or lyrics has come down from heaven. Like any responsible Hip-Hop fan I tune in to see what all the hype is for and I end up losing two and a half minutes of my life. Is this really what being the best rapper alive has come to? The Lil’ Wayne ‘We Takin’ Over’ freestyle amounts to nothing more than cat in the hat rhymes with a nonsensical theme.

I understand that Lil’ Wayne was prah’lee playing around to show his humorous nature, but he needs to start writing down his rhymes like most competent emcees. Flowing off the top of his head shows all of his deficiencies within his rhyming skillsets. For chrissakes people, this dude is almost thirty (born 1979) and he still rhymes as if he were a sixteen year old. It’s not just depth of subject matter that Wayne lacks but just plain old common sense. Kudos to Sickamore for transcribing the lyrics to Wayne’s off the top of the head freestyle. I say it’s off the top of the head because the theme of the lyrics is brainless. Peep game…

Lil’ Wayne tries his best to construct a few verses with polysyllabic terms early in the song. Like any nickel and dime emcee he immediately proves that he should stay in the shallow end of the pool instead of trying to come into the deep water.

“Creative gifted bastard
Spit sporadic”

Don’t we all know that sporadic means ‘occurring singly, or occasionally, or in scattered instances’? Does that word fit with someone who is supposed to be a prolific emcee? Is sporadic how you would want to describe yourself if you had a strong work ethic? Wayne might as well have said that his mic skills were mediocre. That alliteration is more apropos. I was going to stay away from the whole “kiss my daddy” part of the song because it’s silly. I imagine that this is how Wayne addresses all the people that have been questioning his manhood and his sexuality. Not that it matters anymore in Hip-Hop, which has been coming to terms with it’s homo side by the fact that Will.i.am gets so much work and Ja Rule is making a comeback.

Study the transcribed verse of ‘We Takin’ Over’ from top to bottom and see if Lil’ Wayne isn’t trying to tell us a message. He says “No Homo” before he even starts to rhyme. He wholeheartedly admits to kissing a man on the lips with whom he is not a blood relative. He later rhymes about a wet salami (extra nullus) and then he speaks about hanging out with all of his boys in the gayest city in America, even gayer than San Francisco – Miami Beach, Florida. He names his boys and the things they like to do together. Nary is there any talk about females in his rhyme.

Granted, this is a ‘freestyle’ and since he doesn’t write down his lyrics he is prah’lee using his fond recollection to construct the verse. The song is still slipshod and shows that Wayne is far from the best that the rap game has to offer. Listen to the NaS and Game track that XXL has posted for some real Hip-Hop and rap lyricism. Wayne has got a long way to go to reach Game’s level and Jayceon is even younger than Wayne. Birdbrain needs to get his 401k a rhymebook and some broads before I will be impressed with his weak lyrics and weaker metaphors.

On a final note, one of Wayne’s lines in the freestyle says, “It’s a bakery here just trying to get dough”. Now if a bakery doesn’t already have dough in it, how the fuck is it a bakery? Wayne would have been better off saying something like "Cash Money is a bakery, we just watch the dough rise, before our eyes, then we move them pies". See how simple that was and contextually correct. If I can help your favorite emcee make his rhymes better trust me, your favorite emcee is NOT the greatest alive.

If you are one of the retards that thought Lil' Wayne crossed some new ground with his freestyle you are the reason that Hip-Hop is dying. Go out and buy yourself some Dr. Seuss Cat in the Hat books and a Speak and Spell, or better yet, just kill yourself.