DallasPenn.com Presents…P Diddy Is The King Of All Jigs

dpdiddy.jpgA shout goes to XXL online heavyweight Byron Crawford for reintroducing the word jiggaboo into mainstream colloquialism, vis-e-vi the internets. Another shout goes to Sean “Puff Daddy” Combs for ascending to the lofty position of African American pharoah. Diddy is our Sun God. Just like the pharoahs of ancient Egypt were believed to have the power to reincarnate themselves. Diddy has been able to resuscitate his flagging career at every downturn. Just when you think you have seen the last of him – BAM! – he comes back with a disco remix or something catchy to make you forget that you were tired of hearing him rap in the first place.

As you look at Diddy’s career in entertainment you see a guy who has been thrown under the bus several times, only to emerge unscathed and with a new vigor. From his beginnings as a hip-hop party promoter he wasn’t supposed to make it. The incident at Harlem’s City College where people were crushed to death was placed squarely on his back. Being fired from an emerging independent label, Uptown Records, should have blacklisted him in the music industry. Diddy was able to go from pariah to pharoah and even hired his former boss at Uptown Records. How many of you will be hiring your former boss from the Rib Shack? Even without a signature artist Bad Boy Records is still worth multi-millions to the distribution outlets because of one reason…You get Diddy with the price tag. Of all the Hip-Hop albums that will drop in 2006, Diddy’s Press Play might be the only one that you bump well into 2007. Show this man some respect for being the King of all Jigs.

A few weeks ago Curtis “Fifty Cent” Jackson considered stepping into the ring with Diddy. There seemed to be a business arrangement the two of them had made that literally went south (as in Atlanta – Ma$e’s new hoemtown). Fifty Cent considered airing his grievances within the public realm and forcing the hand of Diddy to acknowledge his complaint. In classic kingsmanship style Diddy essentially bit his tongue while he let others around him warn Fifty Cent of what he would have in store for him if he really wanted to go to war. Diddy was not going to be like Ja Rule. Take a moment and ask yourself where Suge
Knight is now. In this video clip from Diddy and Bad Boy Records I peeped a few subtle jabs at Fifty Cent that some of you might pick up.

Now who would’ve thought that the height of gangsterism was a warm, soothing bubblebath? But even the legendary Tupac Amaru Shakur realized the necessity of preserving one’s gangster lean through the use of bubble baths.

dppacbubble.jpgIn the end when you compare the gangster pedigrees of both Fifty Cent and Diddy you have to realize that Fifty Cent is just famous for being shot and getting arrested, while Diddy is famous for being a shooter and beating the charges.

You tell me who is more gangster.

Take that, take that.

  • Belize

    Finally a decent post

    ~Puff~Puff~Propppzzz

    ps. u forgot to mention the fact that diddy’s popz was a G ( a dead G at that), so he was borned with stripez

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  • http://www.myspace.com/16kingz thebestout!!

    1st you cocok sucka’s
    1st time i lost my virginity was in this storage closet with…waitaminute wrong blog!!

    jus like this pice of shit you posted in this goddamn blog look duke if you gon post sumin’ make it relevant to what real hip-hop heads give a fuck about! here are some examples to keep you from gettin’ shitted on via the blog gangsta community nephew!

    1.where’s the new source mag?

    2.How does benzino feel about his new position at Mcdonalds

    3.who has the fat joe/jadakiss/paris hilton sex tape

    4.where’s spider-loc?

    5.how many franchize boys does it take to screw in light bulb?

    see we like to write about interesting topics not some shit about some overrated breakdancer who uses pro-active to preserve his sexy (no g-dep).

  • WhiteChoco

    FIRST!!
    DIDDY is gangsta.

  • Belize

    “This right here is a du-rag, ïts called a durag – u not really aint supposed to wear this in public, but sum people still do”

    ^^haaaaaaaa…..Im guilty Im guilty!!!!

    i think u are the 1st blogger on this website to actually put the youtube video on there blog without a link…not sure though..hmmmmmmm

  • http://www.myspace.com/16kingz thebestout!!

    1st you cocok sucka’s
    ^^^^^^^^^^^

    sorry guys i jizzed up my keyboard when I saw I had the first post and the buttons got sticky.

    websters definition of cocok.

    co-cock:That ohter guy who bangs your girl when you are spending all your time writing xxl internet blogs who conviently wipes his jism on your face towel and puts it back for your usage in the morning.

  • Belize

    >5.how many franchize boys does it take to screw in light bulb?

    ^None, they would just look at it and snap until JD came in and did it for em

  • http://www.myspace.com/16kingz thebestout!!

    Belize Says:

    September 20th, 2006 at 11:38 am
    >5.how many franchize boys does it take to screw in light bulb?

    ^None, they would just look at it and snap until JD came in and did it for em

    lol goddman!!!

  • http://www.allhiphop.com Rey

    no homo juelz santana on this whole comment

    FINALLY!

    Someone acknowledges the main thing I like about Diddy: The man is a fucking survivor. People have tried taking this man down for the last decade, and he’s STILL making quality music. No he doesn’t write his rhymes or make his beats, but if he didn’t have some kind of clue–be it business-wise or just plain knowing what sounds hot–he wouldn’t still be around today.

    For all the fuckin’ haters and cynics and critics and “real” hip-hop fans: Fucking relax, already. You don’t HAVE to listen to Diddy, or anyone else for that matter. Let him live.

    Long live the king!

    (of course, I could be missing the sarcasm in this whole article, but I’m pretty good at sarcasm-detection, and this seems to be genuine. If not, fuck it. Everybody on here knows I’m a Diddy stan anyway)

    UNO, MOTHERFUCKERS!

  • http://www.allhiphop.com Rey

    >5.how many franchize boys does it take to screw in light bulb?

    …there’s a Yung Buttplug joke in here somewhere…

    Also, fuckin’ T.I.s at my job won’t let me actually see any YouTube stuff on here.

    Lastly (because I know someone’s already mad that I’ve left 2 comments), When you think about it, “Preserve my sexy” is either the greatest tag-line ever, or the worst.

    Dare I say it? I feel it’s the former.

  • Mr.Me

    “Even without a signature artist Bad Boy Records is still worth multi-millions to the distribution outlets because of one reason…You get Diddy with the price tag”

    ^^Real talk..thats why niggas like Birdman’s M.A.B.A. ass was blockin the Hot Boyz shine cuz he wanted to be the man on his label incase them niggas ever left.

    **No Homo Warning and Disclaimer**
    An only Paceveli could get away wit that bubble bath shit because he was a true all around artist..an the broads ride for that man more than the niggas do so I guess he was lookin out for them….Im just glad Billy boy didnt flash the pic wit Pac nude covered in jewlrey. damn you Vibe

  • Eastside Bread Maker

    Rey I feel you. I too can’t access f-ing youtube here at work… Heartless bastards!!!

  • crackis great!!

    (as in Atlanta – Ma$e’s new hoemtown)

    spellcheck homey.

    (hoemy)

  • http://www.tonyskansascity.com Tony

    This is why people read Dallas Penn.com, because there is a sense of history. Damn if nobody ever brings up the Harlem City College crush fest.

    Hell, not even John Landis survived a similar disaster with his career intact.

    His staying power is remarkable and probably makes the days of MC Hammer even more filled with regret.

    Still, I always get the two confused.

  • http://dallaspenn.com/weblog/?page_id=291 BILLY SUNDAY

    ^CRACKIS GREAT,
    my bad playboy. no soup for me.

  • http://www.allhiphop.com Rey

    “^^Real talk..thats why niggas like Birdman’s M.A.B.A. ass was blockin the Hot Boyz shine cuz he wanted to be the man on his label incase them niggas ever left.”

    What does M.A.B.A. mean?

    Word, I was 10 (1991) when that CCNY thing happened and I still remember it. Dude was known as Puff Dragon back then tho’. He must’ve changed it to Puff Daddy some time after it. (I don’t blame him)

  • Mr.Me

    Oh my bad..lol…I just got word that its N.A.M.B.L.A. not M.A.B.A. (fuckin acronyms).. yall can continue

  • T-Storm

    and his name is DIDDY

    Everywhere but the UK! lol

  • Eastside Bread Maker

    OK, for the record i would just like to say Fuck Puffy, he’s one grimy ass nigga. With that said, I would also like to say that you can hate him all you want, but that nigga knows how to make money, period! I dont agree with many of his tactics when it comes down to how he has handled his business with his artist and label, but the bottom line is this, Jay Jerkins knows how to rape the shit out of everyone that he comes in contact with. And if at the end of the day, you’re drive and passion is fueled by how much money you have or can accumulate, then that nigga HAS to be considered one very successful jig. Hats off to you, you greedy motherf**ker!!!

  • thoreauly77

    diddy would make an exceptionally oily looking lawn ornament as well….. and if that aint sexy, i dont know what is! (insert homophobic disclaimer here)

  • thoreauly77

    woah, even that disclaimer at the end was pretty gay.

  • http://www.allhiphop.com Rey

    Tangent Time (and I’ll ask this again when Bol gets off his ass and posts)

    What level of gay is it that I don’t hate that Lady Sovereign “Love me or hate me” song? Is that hip-hop? Is it pop? I don’t know which one it is, but I like it.

    I guess I have a softspot for Limeys. Still tho’: “Love me or hate me” >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> “London Bridge”

  • http://www.allhiphop.com Rey

    Thoreau–Um…little queer there, yeah.

  • Eastside Bread Maker

    I must say. That since working at this crumby job that doesnt allow me to access yahoo games, and myspace and youtube, you guys have thoroughly kept me entertained. Keep up the good work, and all the funny shit. It definitely helps me through the day!

  • Spark

    Me, i cant believe Puff Daddy is still relevant today in this hip hop world. bs.

  • http://www.myspace.com/bookwormbrown bookworm brown

    fix your font and maybe i’ll read this dribble.

  • http://www.myspace.com/bookwormbrown bookworm brown

    er, drivel.

  • Belize

    Thor..yeah extreme no homo there buddy

    what was u smokin on to add oil+diddy+lawn ornaments+ur lawn
    together?

  • I Fux

    I hate Diddy, if I was an artist I would go at him hard, One of these days on my blog I will definetly have to write up an essay on his life

  • jimmy

    lmao rey…

    >When you think about it, “Preserve my sexy” is either the greatest tag-line ever, or the worst.

    Dare I say it? I feel it’s the former.

    nullus! way to totally ether yourself.

    i’m feeling that lady sov joint too tho

  • jimmy

    DP,
    no more capitalizing the name drops?

    the switched up style for xxl is dope, but you know it’s missing that realness from your blog. that real realness. you know what i’m talking about. that truth.
    drop that knowledge on these kids!

  • http://www.allhiphop.com Rey

    Jimmy–Okay, the line is a little gay when Diddy says it.

    Imagine Method Man saying it in like 1995. and then add “…on you mu’fuckas!”—It’s way cooler.

    (no josh hartnett)

  • Incilin

    where r the 50 disses in the video?? i aint really notice any.

  • XRAY3000

    “Of all the Hip-Hop albums that will drop in 2006, Diddy’s Press Play might be the only one that you bump well into 2007.”

    You cant be serious….

  • G-UniteyeGotchaBack

    Fif’s not gangsta b/c he got shot, da nigga’s gangsta b/c he lived all things that he raps about. Diddy’s no gangsta he’s a hustla,he’s got money but there’s no G in Diddy, but on the other hand Fifty is a gangsta and a hustla, and he’s caked up as well. Get it right Mr. Author.

  • G-UniteyeGotchaBack

    Please allow me to enlighten these dumb-ass niggas,Fif’s not gangsta b/c he got shot, da nigga’s gangsta b/c he lived all things that he raps about. Diddy’s no gangsta he’s a hustla,he’s got money but there’s no G in Diddy, but on the other hand Fifty is a gangsta and a hustla, and he’s caked up as well. Get it right Mr. Author.

  • G-UniteyeGotchaBack

    Yes, I had to say it twice.

  • koofiesmacker

    It’s about time y’all cock suckaz game that Nigga Diddy his props. But for the record I don’t gree w/ his methods of doing business, but at the same time It’s all business B, Diddy needs to eat.
    But for those who didn’t know, 50 going to war w/ Diddy was career suicide. Really on paper, Diddy is gangsta to the core. Think about it, he shot at mo’fuckaz in the club (while rolling w/ Shyne), But never got nabbed for that, only Shyne did. He stormed Steve “the commissioner” Stouts office, wooped his as hard w/ a basses ball bat,…the boys in blue, had him But no charges where filed. 50 claims diddy knows who killed BIG, but he ain’t talking,…lol Ok ain’t that Gansta? What y’all want diddy to Snitch? 50 you got shot, never even busted a shot back, bet u couldn’t even bust a fart in a club, yet alone a Shot. Oh yeah Bucks was stabbing some guy w/ a butter knife while you were hididng behing Whoo KID.
    Another thing, Diddy went to war with Death Row, …yes mo’fuckaz Death ROW. HE def. Gangsta in my eyes.
    On that note to all hater “press play” & to 50 eat a fat dick

  • The DJ Formerly Known as N-CREDIBLE

    1st of let me say this…do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it…thw weight around your neck is getting heavy…Diddy the Don of Hip Hop…he got more power in his his pink toe than fifty got with his whole camp…Press Play will be one of the top albums of the year along with fabaloso and nas…ok Jay-z…maybe…but Diddy like what SP say…a gangsta and a gentlemen…if niggas dont respect your gentlemen you gotta show’em your gangsta…and I personally believe 50 doesn’t wanna meet Diddy’s gangsta

  • thoreauly77

    well belize, i was thinking about an article i read about how jigaboo lawn ornaments are making a comeback on the lawns of rich white folks while also thinking about how diddy is the biggest jig of all and also that he still always seems oily even though he uses pro-active. and i despise the whole “no homo” thing unless its super clever and not actually homophobic. bu ti wasnt smoking anything, i had had fourteen hangovers from all the heinekens and irish whiskey i drank last night.

  • Belize

    Ahhh whiskey…damn..i bet ur head feels very jasonkidd-kid-ish

  • http://www.allhiphop.com Rey

    LOL @ Belize

    J-Kidd’s kid’s head is fucking enormous. I hear it’s the 10th member of the Wu Tang Clan.

  • frankwhite45

    Diddy can pop a bottle over your dome ask Steve Stoute plus fuck u money wise ask the Lox . So he got that Cosa Nostra principles down pack hes the boss of bosses !!! BAD BOY!! He also cooks meals with ex felons Martha STEWART

    myspace.com/ninohnewjack

  • che

    just what these fiddy wannabes needed to hear.

  • Black London….

    RANDOM INFORMATION: First Week Sales

    N.O.R.E:

    N.O.R.E. y la Familia … Ya Tú Sabe

    In at #82

    11,700 First Week Sales.

    DAMN IT MAN!!

  • Belize

    ^dat dont mean shyt if it sells in latin countries ala daddy yankee etc…

  • Combat Jack

    Diddy is really gully, trust!

    http://www.byroncrawford.com/2005/03/p_diddy_gorilla

    Plus, minutes after dude went apeshit on Steve Stoute with the champagne bottle (you ever try to break one of those? IMPOSSIBLE), I personally heard Mr. Combs ranting and raving about how “he put it on that nigga proper like” and “whose the hottest nigga in New York now?” He runs his public sweet soft persona game like a real pimp (remember Kaiser Sose?) Trust when I say Curtis Jackson really saved his gorilla ass from getting nine more hot ones in his back by kissing Puff’s ring behind closed doors. Yo, Diddy For President, 2008, he’d really know how handle them Islamo Fascists and fellow sand jigs, all the while keeping the peace with the White House Cracker Jacks.

  • Combat Jack

    Plus, how many rappers, niggas, thugs or even soldiers for that matter able to run a complete effin’ marathon? GULLY!

  • http://www.xxlmag.com shawn

    diddy is pussy, just cuz ur dad is gangsta doesn’t mean you are gangsta. tell diddy to go dance with the stars

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  • wisesun

    diddy fuck up hip hop for all the real hiphop heads when he came into the game, i have no love for diddy at all, im not going to think twice about bying his shit. due to him pushing weak ass commercial over remix, simpling garbage shit which took raw out of hip hop for so many year. plus dude fuck his artist over, with no hand on production or writing, just taking the bulk of the cash-in from the creative-ones. the only thing he should get credit for is biggie ready to die, at the same time with no production work on that. so fuck diddy, to me he fuck up shit for the underground giants like wutangclan, and bootcampclik,and the rest of the underground skilled mc, 50 should continue going hard at that bullshit boxsy boy because real hip hop see the bitch in him

  • Danja29

    Waaaaaahsun, let it go… 1995 is over, bruh. I know it’s hard, but it’s possible.

    And if them niggas couldn’t compete, then whose fault is it REALLY that all the “real MCs” fell to the wayside?

    Diddy got me rollin’ with these damn videos on Youtube. And that Pac picture is hilarious, fukk whatcha heard.

  • TRAYMAN

    Does anyone know where i can get the bathtub salt in conneticut.

    That nigga puffy got that classic 1997 mentality.

    The shit is undenyably corny and thats hot.

  • pop a poppa

    “Just when you think you have seen the last of him – BAM! – he comes back with a disco remix or something catchy to make you forget that you were tired of hearing him rap in the first place.”

    Every time he comes back i still wanna beat the shit outta that Poofy fuck.

    and the Poofy one just confirms his gayness with every myspace video he makes. his fruityness has just reached mythic proportions.

    “Step 2 boys and girls… is a mean hair-cut and a manicure-pedicure. even your toes… you never know when you’re gonna have to take your socks off.”

    i forgot that Poofy likes to get a freshly minted big toe right up the pooper before he gets fracked from behind. ask Xzibit! LOL

  • http://www.myspace.com/16kingz thebestout!!

    thebestout!! Says:

    September 21st, 2006 at 8:46 am
    NET NEUTRALITY: FUCK THE GOVERMENT!!

    DO YA’ HOME WORK KIDDIES SOONER OR LATER YOU WON’T BE ABLE TO BLOG ON THIS SHIT NO MORE CUZ’ YO’ SO CALLED GOVERMENT IS TRYING TO MAKE THIS SITE AND OTHER INFORMATIVE MEDIA OUTLETS INACCESIBLE UNLESS THESE COMPANIES PAY OUT THE ASS FOR IT!!IT’S ALL ABOUT INFLUENCE AND UNLESS XXL GOT FOX OR VERIZON TYPE OF $$$$ WE WON’T BE ABLE TO GET THIS SHIT ON THE NET NO MORE, FA’ REAL MUTHA’FUCKAS DO YA’ RESEARCH OR HOME WORK! THIS SHOULD BE A CALLED TO ARMS FOR ALL INTERNET MONEY MAKERS;THOSE OF YOU WITH WEBSITES IN WHICH YOU SELL MEDIA OR INFROMATION,BLOGGERS,UNSIGNED RAPPERS WHO USE THE NET AS A FORM OF EXPOSURE AND SO FORTH.DON’T SET BACK AND LET OUR 1ST AMMENDMENT RIGHTS GET SHITTED ON!EACH ONE TEACH ONE ONCE YOU HAVE INFORMED YOURSELF ON WHAT IS GOIN’ DOWN TELL THE NEXT MAN AND THE NEXT MAN WE GOTTA FIGHT FOR THIS SHIT!

  • the one

    Diddy is gay….True Story.

  • sandino

    dumbass nigga get off bol dick

  • Prince Of The South

    50 going to ruin Bad Boy records, they too weak to be in a beef. When was the last time they had a platinum record, not counting Biggie Duets? 2002 when Diddy’s last solo album dropped. In the four Years that G-unit been out they’ve matched Bad Boy’s thirteen year sales, whe you throw in 50′s albums. Them making of the band girls will go platinum, they already at gold and Yung Joc will be there by the start of 2007, but I don’t see people buying Press Play. Watch it be like Cassie, huge radio play(payola) and no sales. He’ll have a huge first week and then a month later he’ll be out the top 20.

  • http://raptalk.net Trealionaire

    ON SOME REAL SHIT PUFFY’S A DRY SNITCH AND HE WILL NEVER BE A GANGSTA. HE GOT THE NIGGA SHYNE SITTIN DOWN FOR 10 YEARS HOW IS THAT GANGSTA

    PLEASE LET ME KNOW

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  • http://gangstaParadise Gangsta Jimmy

    jimmy is a gangsta

  • ss

    first of all who are you calling a jig.
    puff daddy is not gangta this dude got his own artist knocked he is a staight up snitch that is not gangsta. and yes there is paperwork stating this. puff daddy did not buss his gun it was shyne so do not give him credit for that. PUFF DADDY is a certified snitch. wait till shyne comes home.

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