The Dirty Midwest
Warning for Today's Youth: This post contains links to videos with strong (filthy, really) sexual content. It's a known fact that people who are exposed to a lot of sex at an early age are more likely to become homosexual...
Say what you will about St. Louis, but we did bring you the infamous "Tip Drill" video. Not that this is saying a whole lot, but discounting blogs, it's arguably this area's finest contribution to hip-hop.
It'd be that much cooler if it had more nudity, but I'd say the "Tip Drill" video is arguably the best uncut video of all time. The uncut version of 50 Cent's video for "Disco Inferno" has better looking asses, but the "Tip Drill" video is more ignorant, which is key.
It's been a minute since the only time I watched BET Uncut, but I would assume that those two are the best "uncut" videos of all time. As I recall, there was a Ludacris video where you could see bush, but that was more gross than anything else.
A cursory YouTube search for the string "bet uncut" didn't turn up much other than this video of Chamillionaire getting a lap dance at some strip club in Miami. Did you see the size of that ass? As they say in Northeastern Missouri, Jesus H. Tapdancing Christ!
If there's an unfortunate trend with these uncut videos, it's that a lot of the broads you'd actually want to see naked won't go there. If you notice, the three topless broads dancing in the hot tub in the "Tip Drill" video are kinda skanky, and the main broad you see naked in "Disco Inferno" has tiny Asian woman boobs.
Furthermore, it seems to be the case that you have to travel downmarket to see anything really nasty. Ass jiggling and credit card swiping is one thing, but wouldn't it be nice to see two naked white chicks make out in a shower? That's obviously what Ray Cash was thinking.
If the actual quality of the tang was improved, say, 100 percent, this could've been the greatest uncut video in the history of the form. You guys know I love white women more than I love hip-hop, but these broads look like they might actually be Mexican women (perhaps Tijuana hookers) with wigs. As it is, I'll still give it an E for effort.
I suppose it makes sense that rappers who don't have as much in the way of fiscal resources or, um, talent would have to resort to titilation that much more just to be recognized. In that sense, I guess it was only a matter of time before a group of rappers made a video so filthy it was just... filthy.
And wouldn't you know it was a buncha jigs from St. Louis.
- Freik Mobb: "Hershe Kiss" (YouTube)
Nothing against women who go down on other women, but, um, eww! Even by St. Louis standards, those were some scary-looking beasts. I'm surprised that shit was even allowed on YouTube. I wonder if the TI's at Hershey's Chocolate are aware of this.
UPDATE: kris ex sent this one in. I heard he's really into pr0n.
- 50 Cent: "P.I.M.P." (Uncut Version) (YouTube)