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Nature of a Sista

Yeah Luda hates her. And 50 is currently co-signing. Yup, the rap world just ain’t feelin’ Oprah Winfrey nowadays. Maybe we’re just hating ’cause she’s got more hustle than Russell, more fame than Dame, owns more stuff than Puff, stacks more pay than Jay, and her bank roll extends longer than Eminem’s. Plus, she can put herself on the cover of her own magazine anytime she wants and no one says shit.

Let’s keep it a hundred, you silly curmudgeon: Ole girl’s a rich bougie 52-year-old Black woman who made a fortune off being the voice for old White women—do we really expect her to respect and understand hip-hop culture? Nigga, please.

Still as much we may be disturbed by her closed-door policies, her notoriety is just too much to ignore. That’s why for the longest, unbeknownst to the Chi-town tycoon, Stedman’s boo’s gotten her fair share of shout-outs from an eclectic group of rap artists. Here’s what we have to say about a woman who doesn’t want to hear what we got to say. It’s not right, but it’s okay.

“A landlord named Roper/Did a show at the Copa/When I finished with this I’ll be paid like Oprah.”—Grand Puba from Brand Nubian’s “All For One” (1990)

“Now my great-great-granddad was hung on the tree by the colored man/You probably know him as a White man/I seen the Oprah Winfrey show/She said that was in the past/Man, kiss my ass.”—Grand Puba “Soul Controller” (1992)

“Don’t fuck with no devil/I’d rather marry Oprah/Yeah, you got it/I’m pro Black.”—A.G. from Showbiz and A.G.’s “Represent” (1992)

“I’m bein’ the best that a Black man can be/Blowin’ up just like Oprah Winfrey.”—T. Strong from Original Flavor’s “Grip Da Mic Tight” (1992)

“Hocus pocus/You can try to focus/But you won’t see me/I see you like fuckin’ Oprah’s fat ass/Up on a fat-ass screen.”—Psycho Les from the Beatnuts’ “Hit Me With That” (1994)

“Molest your mind like Oprah Winfrey’s behind when she was a small child.”—Chino XL “Riiiot!” (1996)

“Prices keep on elevatin’, escalatin’ and fluctuatin’ like Oprah Winfrey’s weight/Hesitatin’, eliminatin’ competitor’s competition out the gate.”—E-40 “Dirty Deeds” (1998)

“Nigga pop her/Stick a chick proper/Double platinum Oprah soap opera watchers/Gossipers/I’m popular.”—MF Doom “Impostas” (2000)

“I put the work in, any predictament/In fact it don’t matter to me/The rap Oprah Winfrey with less currency/But rock beautifully, no security with me.”—Cappadonna “War Rats” (2001)

“The ones who watch videos and do what they see/As cute as can be, up in the club with fake ID/Careful, ‘fore you meet a man with HIV/You can host the TV like Oprah Winfrey.”—Nas “I Can” (2002)

“I hustle, I got more Franklins in me than Aretha/If I had Oprah Winfrey, I would marry her and keep her.”—MJG from 8Ball and MJG’s “Forever” (2004)

“Music slower than a running turtle, tell you what they sip in my circle/Samuel Jackson, Whoopie Goldberg, Oprah Winfrey, the color purple.”—Chamillionaire “Switch Styles” (2005)

Kanye West “I Met Oprah Winfrey” (2002)

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This mix-tape freestyle would eventually lead to an eventual on-air appearance. Miss O even confirmed the story at the end of the song on her show. It’s the one time I watched her wack-ass program.

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