FEATURE:The Hollyhood Awards Pt.2

XXL recently went Hollywood on everyone (don’t worry, we don’t wear our sunglasses at night) for our November 2008 issue. We gave you the rundown on the hottest rappers turned actors (“Flipping The Script”), listed 10 other MCs with Tinsel Town ambitions (“The Others”), and fashioned the next class of directors to shape La La Land (“Well Red”). As always, though, XXL magazine space can be XXS and limited. Some of the XXL Hollywood Awards on the back page weren’t published. So without further ado, here are the rest of the awards that never made it into the original ceremony. Cue the Twentieth Century Fox music right about now.

*MOST UN-BELIEVABLE RAPPER AWARD: Despite showing range in the course of their careers, these gifted thespians can tackle just about any role…except a rapper. And the nominees are…

>Brandon T. Jackon as Aplo Chino, Tropic Thunder

>Jammie Kennedy as B-Rad, Malibu’s Most Wanted

>Terrence Howard as DJay, Huslte & Flow

>Mekhi Phifer as Future, 8 Mile

Winner: Terrence Howard. It’s not only hard out there for a pimp, but it’s not a great time for actors either. Howard was recently replaced on Iron Man 2 by Don Cheadle, according to reports. That trick got whooped!

*FLIP THE SCRIPT (Best Movie Line Jack) AWARD: Why rip off ya man on the block’s life story, when you can steal directly from Hollywood big shots.

>Kanye West on Ne-Yo’s “So Sick” RMX (Borrower):I’m Kinda of a big deal.”

Will Ferrell as Ron Burgundy, Anchorman: The Legend Of Ron Burgundy (Lender):I’m kind of a big deal.”

>Jay-Z in “Friend Or Foe,” Reasonable Doubt (Borrower):Don’t you ever, no matter the weather, ever, ever, ever, ever come around here no more.”

Chris Tucker as Smokey, Friday (Lender):I’ma call you, but if you come by here, I won’t call you. Don’t ever…ever…ever, ever, ever, ever, ever come by here…ok?”

>Jay-Z in “Takeover,” Blueprint (Borrower):What, you trying to kick knowledge?”

Larenz Tate as O-Dog in Menace To Society (Lender):You trying to kick some knowledge, motherfucka?”

>A Million Rappers (Borrower): Say Hello to my little friend.”

Al Pacino as Tony Montana in Scarface (Lender):Say hello to my little friend.”

Winner: Jay-Z in “Friend Or Foe”

*MOST IMPROVED RAPTOR (Rapper-Turned-Actor): They started out garbage, and now they have a spark.

>Method Man: How High clapped his rap cred, but a string of gigs on Oz, The Wire, and CSI earned him his SAG card as far as we’re concerned.

>Ludacris: He started his film career in rap movie world, playing alongside Dr. Dre and Snoop in The Wash and Jin in 2 Fast 2 Furious, before he crossed over to the legit side of acting with roles in Crash and Hustle & Flow.

>Andre 3000: Be Cool was a disaster, but turns in Idlewild and Semi-Pro turned him into a legitimate Hollywood player.

>Snoop Dogg: He has more film credits than weed arrests, and over the course of 15 years he’s gone from understudy (Baby Boy) to master student (Starsky & Hutch).

Winner: Method Man. The Wu-Tang alum has a good thing going in Hollywood and he’s even surprised us, because we can’t tell if he’s really a wack rapper now or if he’s just “acting” like one.

*RAP STAR FUCKER AWARD: These actors and directors love to be in pictures with rappers more than Superhead.

>John Singleton: Casted rappers in seven of the eight movies he’s directed.

>Samuel L. Jackson: Trashed rappers only to turn around and co-star with LL Cool J (Deep Blue Sea & S.W.A.T.), Ice Cube (XXX: State Of The Union) and David Banner (Black Snake Moan).

>Spike Lee: Has also worked with his share of rhyme spitters, directing Sticky Fingaz and Fredro Starr in Clockers, Mos Def and a few others in Bamboozled and Q-Tip in She Hate Me.

>Terrence Howard: Whooped Ludacris’ ass in two straight movies (Hustle & Flow and Crash).

Winner: John Singleton. He’s successfully guided more rapper’s careers outside of anyone named Russell Simmons.

*MOST NAMEDROPPED MOVIE CHARACTER IN LYRICS: Rappers just love comparing themselves to the following characters. And the nominees are…

>Bishop in Juice: Adulated across rap’s sub genres, Gangster rappers and conscious MCs have all referenced the Tupac-incarnated character.

>Tony Montana in Scarface: MC’s either wanna be the son, or the black equivalent to Scarface’s lead character.

>Jason Voorhees in Friday The 13th Series: Most rappers fancy themselves unstoppable killing machines just like Jason.

>Frank White in King Of New York: Biggie may have made Frank White his moniker, but just about any NYC MC aspires to be the apple’s top dog.

WINNER: Bishop

  • SOUTHSIDE A-TOWN

    first!!!

    nothing else really 2 say… who cares bout dis shit?

  • http://myspace.com/jonchavira Grenade

    Fuck that! This feature was interesting.

    myspace.com/jonchavira

    -Grenade

  • JeffDaChef

    Wassup with the huge spaces at the beginning of all the articles now.

  • produnkgirl

    Just the other day I was like “You got the juice now” LOL I thought it was funny.

  • d

    Caine said, “what u tryin to kick knowledge?” when he jacked ol dude at the burger place… not o-dog dumb shits that movie is classic and u cant get ya shit straight??? ass…

  • Sugafoot79

    news flash. O-Dog did say you try’na kick knowledge. it was Kane