Lost Ones

I touched on it briefly (no Boutros) in my first-ever dis record roundup, mainly the fact that I don't particularly care for it as a song, but Jay-Z's new "not a dis record" "Lost Ones" brings up enough interesting points that it merits an entry of its own.

Over the course of the song's three verses, Jay-Z addresses three individuals from his past that he's since lost - his former bidness partner Damon Dash, his former(?) girlfriend Beyonce, and his nephew who died in a car Jay bought him.

Verse 1: Jay-Z vs. Damon Dash

What did cause the fallout between Jay-Z and Damon Dash, anyway? We know about the time Jay-Z went out of town and Dame Dummy decided it would be a good idea to make Cam'ron vice president of the company, but there had to be more to it than that, right?

You don't learn much about what went down between the two of them in "Lost Ones," but you get the idea that it had more to do with money than anything else, which is sad. Basically, Jay-Z realized at some point that he could make that much more money if he didn't have to split it in half with that ass-clown.

Maybe one of the TIs at Def Jam even put this idea in his ear.

Could Jay-Z have built the Roc-A-Fella empire by himself? It's true that Damon Dash hasn't done much of anything since Jay cut him off, but what has Jay himself done with Def Jam, really? The truth of the matter is that both of them are only shells of their former selves. At least Jay has the benefit of being able to rap.

Verse 2: Jay-Z vs. Beyonce

So Jay-Z and Beyonce are broken up, or is their relationship just on the rocks, so to speak? I think it's common knowledge that Jay-Z has been having his way with Rihanna for some time now, and who can blame him. It's a rich man's MO to get a little bit on the side every now and again, right?

I know I'd hate to think that I made $300 million in the space of ten years just to have to wait until my girlfriend got off tour to get some action. I'd fucking cancel that tour if I had to, even if I was only worth one-tenth as much. After all, a man has his needs. And Destiny's Child sucks anyway.

I suppose it's a good thing she's on a separate label.

Then of course there's the matter of Jay getting up there in years. He's mentioned time and time again in interviews that he'd like to have kids (not just abortions), but Beyonce can't very well be someone's mother if she's off in Houston grinding against Sean Paul for money, now can she?

In fact, the guy's closer in age to my parents than he is to myself and yet all my parents' kids are grown and out of college. If he doesn't have any kids before too long, people are going to start thinking he's gay. (Speaking of which, would any of you broads reading this like to have Bol, Jr?)

Verse 3: Jay-Z vs. his dead nephew

I suppose having lots of nephews is like having your own kids (or a girlfriend, for that matter) in the sense that you can buy them shit to make them love you. But even that could backfire if the shit you bought them ended up killing them. Hence Jay's devastation over his nephew's tragic death in a car Jay bought him?

I know, that's just wrong. But still.